Remembered
by givadid
Summary: Takes place eight years after end of series, ignores 5 years later webisode. Just like to say thanks for reviews, and to everyone who had read it so far , please R and R! I own nothing apart from Archie, Chapter 5 is M rated. Chapter 6 on less painful!
1. Chapter 1

She looked at the body lying on the coach, shuck her head at the girl being in such a state again, she saw the bottles strewn around, varying bottles of liquor, from vodka to whiskey, she shivered at the thought. She saw the girl shiver, and moved to close the window that she had left open in her inebriated state, it was reflex more than anything, her hand as usual passed through it. "Damn" she tucked her blonde hair behind her ear, even in death it still managed to get in her eyes, the only time she could seem to touch anything in this world was in the hour of dawn, she sat on the chair opposite her lover, she looked over her every night now, she tucked her knees under her chin and waited for dawn to begin.

Morning arrived finding Ashley Davies lying on a sofa covered in a blanket, her hand grasped desperately on the table, trying to find a glass of water, she found it exactly where it always was the night after a drinking session "Thanks" she whispered to no one, the realisation caused her to open her eyes. She stared blankly at the studio apartment, unable to bring herself to feel much emotion at the emptiness of her home.

She had, had the dream again, she pulled the blanket away from herself and made her way to the kitchen, the dream was of someone cleaning up the house as she slept, making sure that it was tidy for when she woke up, she never knew who it was until she felt a kiss against her forehead and a whispered 'love you' in her ear, it was her soul mate.

She knew it was her mind playing tricks on her, in all reality, she was the one who cleaned up, who got very drunk, destroyed her house then tidied it up. She angrily took a bowl and filled it with cereal, noting that again her fridge had been filled with food, when she thought it was empty only yesterday. "Stop it!" she shouted at herself, chewing on the cereal with momentary satisfaction.

She saw her answer phone flashing and pressed the button as she sat on her kitchen stool finishing off her breakfast "Now I hate to nag Ashley" she rolled her eyes at Paula's usual starting phrase, apparently hating something with Paula did not mean necessarily that she didn't do it "But you have not been to see us in a month" there was a pause on the line "I know this time of the year is hard, it is for all of us…we miss her, we loved her" she caught the crack in Mama Carlin's voice at the recollection of the loss of her only daughter "Sorry…I promised myself I wouldn't cry…it's a good job you have the longest answer phone messaging machine in the worldBEEP" she smiled at that, Paula did seem to go on these days, the answer machine informed her the second message was about to be read she smiled knowing who this would be "Apparently it is not as long as it needs to be. Right Ashley, call the house, you know the number and come over and see us sometime"

She erased both messages then put her bowl in the sink. She wandered over to her computer switching it on to see what songs she still needed to complete for deadline, there was only two which still were unfinished, she pressed play trying to figer away of improving them, there was something wrong with the first song, something she could not figure out.

She listened to it again and again getting slowly more and more agitated when her phone went off in her pocket she slid it open "What?"

"Is that anyway to speak to your only sister" Ashley rolled her eyes, at Kyla's sing song voice came from the phone "Sorry, I am stuck on a song"

"Musical block, all the great ones suffer from it" she smiled sensing that Ashley was already coming back at her with a deadpan answer "Anyway, before you get back to it, Paula rang me asking if you were ok?" her forehead knotted together in the worry for her sister "Kyla I will ring Paula, but I'm fine"

"No you're not" she heard Ashley sigh and knew she hated the fuss from herself and Paula "Ok I'm not, but I will be" Kyla never knew what to say at this stage "Well Paula said she is free today, why don't you leave the music and we can go see Spencer" the silence on the other end of the phone was indicative of Ashley considering the request she sighed again an admittance of defeat "great, I will pick you up in an hour go get yourself sorted"

She put the phone down on her sister then walked to where Aiden sat on the coach with his four-year-old mongrel Archie, she sat next to the large animal and scratched his ear, which caused him to wag his tail "How did she sound?" Kyla took comfort in the dog willing the tears not to fall from her eyes "Better than she did last year" he nodded looking at the television blankly.

"I should ring Paula let her know we are coming" Aiden smiled at her holding her hand, stroking it gently "Yeah, though she will probably know you are, you are very persuasive" a small smile graced her lips though it was hard to muster too much of a grin this time of year "you're probably right, but I should anyway. Sometimes no one is persuasive enough" this time the tears flowed freely and Archie was unceremoniously thrown on the floor by Aiden as he hugged the dark haired girl

"I just thought it would be easier for her by now" Aiden nodded

"It is Kyla, she seems to be living a little easier, I mean she doesn't seem to be drinking as much, you said yourself the flat is much cleaner" she pulled away from his arms and wiped her tears "Yeah, you're right, of course you are. Just sometimes, her voice it's so empty, so lifeless it's like a part of her is dead" he leant forward and kissed her on the head, no more words were necessary, she stood up and moved to the phone.

The wind whipped lightly against their faces as all three of them looked at the stone tablet before them, a inconsequential grave to most, but to two of these women their hearts were captured by it:

Spencer Carlin

_Loving Daughter _

_Beautiful wife_

Ashley didn't care much for this monument to her lovers passing, she had never been religious, but in all the grief of that time, she gave this as a gift to Paula, to allow her daughter to be put at rest here, not to argue against it, they all had lost so much. Paula kneeled next to the grave, putting flowers neatly in place, she did it every week but this day was special.

"Hey, its just Ashley, me and Kyla at the moment. Dad and Glen are coming on their own later" her voice caught and Ashley started to feel the bile rise against the back of her throat at the emotion of this situation, she never should of listened to Kyla, why had she come here she could of grieved at home, she shouldn't blame Kyla though, it may have seemed like it was her she was listening too, it wasn't, she was keeping a promise she had made to Spencer, one she couldn't break;

The television was blaring, screams coming from it continuously, as the film they had been watching had ended in a bloody demise, not you usual anniversary movie, she opened her eyes seeing blonde hair resting on her chest, she smiled looking down at the creature, she felt the body move and blue eyes met her own "Hey sleepy head" Spencer smacked her gently on the arms and turned over kissing her where her head had just laid "Shut up, you were the one snoring missy" the look on Ashley's face was a picture of pure shock "I do not snore!" though she could not keep up the outrage for long as Spencer laughed, her eyes glinting and Ashley was once again enraptured by her wife. "Did you enjoy our anniversary" Spencer nodded and lent up kissing Ashley on the lips "It was perfect, just like you" they both grinned now and laughed lightly, Spencer's attention was caught by the television, as the news had started. Ashley could see the distraction escalating to ruining their alone time so turned it off. Spencer eyes met her own again a thoughtful expression on her face "What's up Spence" she could not help the smile that graced her features at the shortening of her name, "It just seems so sad" the brunette knew immediately the news story had effected her sensitive girlfriend, "When people die there is a lot of anger, love, people fall out" she was referring to the arguments that had torn a fairly well known celebrity family apart after the death of their actor father. Spencer brow crinkled again "I know, but I just would never want that to happen to my family" Ashley smiled kissing the girl lovingly on the lips "It wouldn't, you and Glen get on great now" she nodded "Will you promise me something?" Ashley rolled her eyes and then had the good grace to look thoroughly chastised when Spencer hit her "Yes I promise I will make you and Glen talk if you fall out over your parents death"

"No I don't mean that" it was Ashley's turn to look perplexed by the situation and indicated for Spencer to continue "If something happens to me, will you promise to try and not fall out with my family" Spencer could see that Ashley had been taken aback by the request and was unhappy with it "Nothing ever will Spencer, so I don't need to promise" Spencer leaned up and kissed her lover, and best friend on the mouth "I know, but please?" Ashley rolled her eyes wondering why she gave into this girl so easily, looking into the deep blue eyes, her heart filled with love and she knew why "I promise" she was kissed thoroughly for it.

She looked at Paula who knelt there tidying around the grave, which did not require it, and a tear slipped from her eyes _see where my promises got me_ she smiled knowing Spencer would be rolling her eyes at her, telling her that 'she promised, and good wives never break them' she always was an old romantic that way, such an idealist.

Paula stood up and linked arms with Kyla "we will leave you to it" Ashley nodded not knowing what to do in this place on her own, she only been here twice before and one of them was when they buried her, and then just after the first anniversary. It wasn't as if was too emotive for her, though that wasn't entirely true, it was more that this was not her wife, this was where her shell was buried her wife was at the home they had shared, in the memories of the place, that was where she remembered her.

She looked back and saw Paula and Kyla looking expectantly from the car 300 yards away and turned back looking at the simple grave. "I know I don't usually do this, but well your mum has been more needy recently, and I think this will make her happy" she laughed trying to stop the tears from coming "I know, I know, if you had asked me eight years ago if I would be trying to cheer up Paula Carlin, I would of told you, you were mad. I mean remember when she dragged me out of the house, so you can see my point, then I had to break you out!" she paused the sadness overwhelming her, "I sometimes wonder if I would of fought so hard, if I had known that it would eventually hurt so much"

The tears fell freely, she thought of Spencer when they had first made love, when she had forgiven her after prom, and she knew she would be powerless to stop it. She gasped at the pain of the memories the overwhelming sense of abandonment, the anger, she knelt down looking at the flowers Paula had laid out she saw something smooth and dark hidden behind it, it was a stone, two, one for each anniversary of her wives death, she picked it up feeling it in her hands, there was only one person who left these;

"Do you want me to stay or just drop you off?" Spencer fidgeted in her seat looking out of the window, Ashley carefully placed her hand over that of her girlfriends "It's okay if you want it to be just you and your family, I get it" Spencer shyly smiled at her, leaning over and kissing her chin "I know, thanks I think mum wants it to be just family, I know she is okay with us now but…STOP!" Ashley slammed on the breaks and closed her eyes, as her heart beat rapidly in her chest, she looked next to her, the passenger seat was suddenly vacant, she looked through the window screen and saw Spencer picking something up from the side of the road. Ashley got out worried at what just happened "Spencer?" she asked in an exasperated voice, the blond turned round and smiled holding something in her hand "Sorry, I just remembered I needed to get this" Ashley saw a small stone in her girlfriends hands "A rock, you almost gave me a heart attack to stop and pick a rock" her voice was so incredulous even Spencer couldn't help but grin even with today, being what it was "Clay never liked flowers, he said he never understood why girls insisted on receiving them when they just died" her face fell a little as she said this last part but the remembering of her brother kept her from crying "He said rocks were much better, I laughed at him, we were only young, but he didn't care, he said along as they were pretty it was the same thing" Ashley couldn't help but smile lovingly at this girl, even after the shock of having to suddenly break she put her arms round Spencer and placed a comforting kiss on her lips.

She tried to think of anyone else that would put it there, as far as she knew Spencer never did tell anyone why she brought stones instead of flowers, so they wouldn't know the significance. Then again Glen had made fun of her for it, when she had put it on the grave, in his usual big brother way, perhaps it was his way of remembering her.

She shuck her head trying to get rid of this hope that kept being perpetually brought up, it was making it harder for her to move on "I love you" she whispered placing the stone back. She stood up wiping her eyes and made her way back to there other two, who were now sitting in the car "so where would you like to go for lunch then girls, we could go out, or Arthur could make sandwiches" Ashley hadn't seen Arthur or Glen for a long time, and thought she should make an effort, especially on the day they were all grieving "Sandwiches sound good"


	2. Chapter 2

She looked at the grave that was suddenly vacant of spectators her heart breaking in two, the words Ashley spoke hauntingly passing through her mind; _"I sometimes wonder if I would of fought so hard, if I had known that it would eventually hurt so much" _She knew the anger that filled her wife, she had seen it nearly every night for the past month. Those rants however were always when the beautiful brunette was drunk and part of her had hoped that when the girl was sober she wouldn't feel so angry still.

The grave looked well maintained, she knew her mother would, she felt such pain for them all, her parents had lost two children within a few years of each other, and it seemed terribly unfair. They seemed to be coping better than Ashley, she was beginning to hide it better though, getting herself dressed smiling at appropriate times, Spencer was the one who cleaned the house ever morning still, when Ashley seemed too drunk to cope with it, and she couldn't help feeling that perhaps now she was doing more harm than good by sticking by her wife's side.

She had been in this place for two years now, this place of death, the time frame for her was a little fuzzy since her death, at first it had been snapshots of existence, moments since her death her funeral, the screaming and crying from her family, then her first anniversary. She was attached to them couldn't move about freely, it was like a dream she could not control, she stayed in that state for a while, slowly being able to control things more and more, but it was not until the first anniversary of her death where she could control herself entirely. She had found it hard to adjust to existing day-by-day being close to those she loved but never a true part of their lives. Initially she had found it hard to be with them every day, as they were still consumed with their grief but she found she could not be away for too long, missing them to much, so after two months of milling around everyone she had returned to the place she had called home for five years to the women she had called home for that time, to be with her and protect her like she had before.

She remembered how the place had looked, bottles and take out cartons littered her old pristine apartment, Ashley seemed broken, passed out, a bottle griped in her hand her hair unkempt, and she seemed so thin, almost gaunt. It was then she discovered she could touch things, only in such an early hour, she had brushed Ashley's bangs from her eyes and kissed her forehead, and whispered "I love you" Ashley had smiled and Spencer stood back with shock, when she tried to do it again though, she wasn't able to and she cursed. Looking out of the window, she saw the sunrise glinting through the large windows; it was not until the next dawn that she could test her theory.

She had thought she had made things easier for her wife, she over heard Kyla saying she smiled more now, perhaps the brunette could sense her being there and felt a little less lonely. Now though she wasn't so sure, with the heart breaking confession that fell from Ashley's lips she wondered if she was making it worse for her wife, perhaps she needed to leave to let Ashley move on. She watched the car drive away out of the cemetery taking her heart with it, tears fell from her eyes "forgive me" she turned around walked away, leaving her wife to morn.

Ashley decided to walk the stairs up to her apartment; now days she never seemed to get much exercise _I suppose that is what you get for spending all your time with a computer. _She admitted to herself, if no one else that she was turning a little agoraphobic, but she couldn't help it, her house seemed so comforting like she was not quite so alone when she was there.

She unlocked the door stepping in, and suddenly the coldness of it hit her, she was momentarily confused, her apartment was always warm when she entered, _Spencer had always…_ she stopped _her wife had always made sure the heating had been on when she got home_. She went over to the timer realising that she had never adjusted it herself _but I am sure for the past year at least it has been on when I have been out _she shuck her head, thinking maybe they had just had a milder winter than usual the past year, and turned it on.

She tried to remember whether or not the apartment had been warm or not the first year without Spencer but she couldn't be sure much of anything back then, it was a numbing blur of pain and depression, and she wondered not for the first time if it hadn't been for Spencer's family and Kyla if she would of come out of the other side, she concluded she probably wouldn't have.

She walked over to her computer turning it on; she looked around her apartment something felt out of place as if something that was there yesterday that was missing today. She shrugged her shoulders nothing seemed out of place, it was the same, perhaps it had been spending a day with other people. She looked over to the fridge, knowing that she had a bottle of wine left over from the previous day, she knew she shouldn't she had had a good day comparatively with how it could of gone, Glen and Arthur had been pleased to see her and she had enjoyed spending time with them, but she felt so alone now, the apartment not offering the comfort it usually did, and she though one glass of wine may help her relax. She walked over took a glass from the cupboard, which was on the other side of the kitchen to the fridge, it hadn't changed position since nearly four years ago:

"SPENCER!" Ashley moved around her kitchen trying to find where the glasses were, when she had left for the studio that morning, they had been next to the fridge, in the eight hours she had been away someone seemed to have moved them and she had a feeling she knew who. "What?" she turned around seeing Spencer smiling at her from the other side of the kitchen counter her head tilted to the side, in one of her more adorable positions while clothed. "Where are the glasses?" Spencer walked around opening the cupboard on the far side and taking out a glass and passing it to Ashley. "Why is it there?" Spencer smiled and kissed the brunette loving on the lips

"_I thought I would sort this place out, I mean it is just our place now" Ashley nodded squinting her eyes suspiciously at her girlfriend "Yes it is. So you thought you would make this clear by hiding my glasses" _

"_No, of course not, but it makes more sense for them to be over there, they are next to all the other cups" Ashley looked around the kitchen assessing that that was indeed true "Yes, but they are for Coffee, which is over there, glasses are for juice which is over here" she tilted her head in the direction of the fridge and Spencer looked down sheepishly, Ashley started to feel a little guilty for pointing this out, she had never known guilt quite like that of when she hurt Spencer, from the major things to little things like this, she worried sometimes that she would do anything to waylay this feeling and make that girl smile adoringly, so she gave in. "I see your point though, keeping them all together makes sense, at least I will know where to put them when I have finished washing up" Spencer laughed knowingly "What?" one eye brow raised questioningly at Ashley "You haven't washed up once since I have been living here" Ashley scoffed at the accusation "I have too" Spencer rolled her eyes and began to walk away "The first week does not count, and I am still sure that was mostly Kyla covering for you" Ashley crumbled to herself then turned around fixing herself a drink "Not washed up. HA. I wash up all the time, moving my glasses…Hey" she was hit squarely on the back of the head by something soft and cloth like, she looked at the offending material and realised it was a top, she looked up at Spencer who was standing there in only her underwear "Are you going to stand there grumbling all day or are you going to show me how much you missed me" Ashley gulped her juice and ran over to her girlfriend. _

She smiled at the memory Spencer had always known how to cheer her up, she looked around her apartment realising she hadn't felt this alone in quite sometime, she put the glass down and made her way out of the apartment. She needed company tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been sometime since Spencer had walked through the streets of LA; only a few times since she decided to stay in their old apartment full time, she had felt almost alive in the confines of that small place. Out here, however was very different it made her think how truly alone she was. Her mind drifted to those early questions of this new existence, the thoughts of why she was here at all. She cursed her mother all that talk of God and an afterlife, her mother had hated her for a while because of that religion, all those months of anger and bitterness, and all for a lie. She stood on the side of the road looking at the cars passing slowly in the evening traffic the sun was setting and she realised this was the start of the rest of her death, she was never going to see her wife again, her family, she was now truly alone and she had no idea how to change any of it. She ran, tears clouding her eyes, her legs carrying her faster than they ever had in life, she ran through crowds passing through bodies that shivered never knowing what they had just experienced. She saw the building in front of her a grand mockery to her existence. She ran through the doors the coldness of the building surrounded her, the stain-glassed windows flickering in the evening light. She stopped in front of the altar knees buckling and the pain the anger she had kept inside since the time she had died poured out of her "WHY? WHY?" she put her head in her hands tears falling paining sobs racking her body "why..."

It was with some reluctance that Ashley appeared at 'Cruise' bar, it was 10pm and where as other bars were bustling on this night this one was quieter like many a bar in LA before it, this one was experiencing falling profits and quieter trade. She was immediately let in by the bouncers, they knew who she was, but even if they hadn't she would have had to done something extreme for them not to let her in this club tonight. She walked to the bar smiling at the server who seemed far to eager for someone who was probably working an all-nighter "What can I get you?"

"I'll have a beer, and can you tell the owner, Ashley's here" the girl nodded grabbing a drink from behind the bar and passing it to the brunette before heading out back to tell the proprietor she had a guest. She found a booth and sipped her beer letting the soft sounds of the guitar music filter through her consciousness, "Well two times in one day" she looked up recognising the voice anywhere, though she was still surprised to see Glen, she smiled and followed him with her eyes as he took a seat opposite. "Hey, what are you doing here?" he shrugged his shoulders "Same as you, having a beer with a friend, trying to pretend today is any normal day" she gulped at that statement knowing it was the same for all of them today "Madison is just going through some of the final plans for the new place, she said she will be out in a minute" she nodded and an awkward silence filled the air as they sat opposite each other, united in nothing but grief "Mum said it was the first time you had been to the grave in a while" she took a sip of beer nodding, not knowing what to say, he put his hand over hers, she looked at it the sensation felt alien to her somehow "Ashley, you look really lost, worse than you did today…has something happened?" she thought over everything that had happened over the past few days, no longer than that, she wondered if he would think she was crazy, she wondered if she cared anymore. If she was, surely it was better to know than have these things niggling at the back of her skull a question never answered for her, she needed to talk to someone, and as she looked at Glen she realised he might be the only one to listen, he would want to believe Spencer was with them too. "Hey guys sorry to keep you waiting" Madison sat next to Ashley stopping the sentence that was about to leave her mouth in its tracks, Glen gave her the 'we will talk about this later look' she smiled, "I got us a round of shots, Spencer's favourite" Ashley looked at the shot that was placed in front of her noting that it was sambuca she shivered hating the drink herself, but knowing that Spencer had always had a fondness for it "For my Wife" all of them smiled the sadness in the back of their minds forgotten as they all remembered the blond in the better times. "Spencer" they drank and the liquid burnt the back of their throats heads were shuck and they all grinned mischievously.

Time is a rather relative thing, Ashley mused as she sat in Madison's club with Glen on her left sipping the last of a vodka, she looked around noting the music had stopped but the lights were still not fully up "What time is it?" Glen shrugged his shoulders then grasped his watch trying to make it out "5…maybe" he grinned looking at Ashley she couldn't help but return it "She would want you to, you know" she looked at him even if she wasn't drunk the sentence, she was sure, would not have made sense "Spencer…she would have wanted you too laugh" she smiled softly suddenly feeling sober "I know, but she isn't here to tell me that is she?" he shuck his head elbows on his knees as they sat on the steps leading to the dance floor, there was only him and Ashley in the club now, apart from Madison who was cashing up. "What happened then today?" she looked at him remembering the interruption to their conversation before, "The apartment seemed emptier" he nodded as if he knew exactly what she meant "The heating was off" he nodded again, then stopped and looked at her "I don't get it" she saw Madison making her way back to them smiling also in a drunken stupor "can you come round tomorrow, at 11?" he agreed and she smiled standing up to greet her previous enemy "thanks for this Madison"

"That's okay, it was a fitting end before the re-vamp" she kissed Ashley on the cheek "Next time, try and make it out when there are people around" she smiled knowing that if the house seemed how it usual did she would not be here for sometime.

She sat on the sofa a blanket wrapped around her body; she sniffled and took a generous swig from the bottle of whiskey she held in her hands. The tears came willingly, the house had felt no warmer, as empty as it had before and she couldn't deal with the feeling. She took another drink. This was not the first time she had felt like this, not even the first time this week she had drank herself to sleep, but it was the first time she had felt this pure emptiness, and pain in a long while, and she didn't know this time if she could recover. She let he mind be consumed with the fantasy of the madness that was taking over, what if Spencer had been here, what if every morning she had cleaned the house, put the heating on, kissed her and told her she had loved her. That would be the reason the house had been so comforting, in her own way Spencer had still been with her, still loved her, this thought did not stop the tears or the drinking, if that was the truth, if Spencer had been here all that time having not left her, then why was she not here now, what had caused her to abandon her when she was so fragile. She placed her head on the pillow of the sofa looking at the sun rising in the distance and fell into a fitful sleep.

"Are you going to lie there all night?" Spencer opened her eyes; confused to the words that were being spoken, she sat up, wondering by the complete darkness of the church how long she had laid there crying. She saw a man sitting on the end of a pew and realised he was looking at her she looked behind her trying to see who he was talking too "New are we?" she looked at him again suddenly realising that he was indeed speaking to her "Are you talking to me?" she stood up and he laughed shaking his head "Definitely new" he looked her up and down and then pattered the seat next to him, she sat down too bemused to do anything else, she stared at him and realised he was wearing a priests outfit "Are you dead?" he nodded and smiled and then touched her on the shoulder delicately, it had been long since anyone had done that, that she flinched "Child, when did you die?" he asked with genuine curiosity in his voice "two years today" he breathed out deeply and shuck his head clearly shocked by her response "How long has it been since you had a conversation with someone?"

"Since then, you are the first person"

"Well then I am honoured, how come you are here then?" she shuck her head she was embarrassed "I was angry, I needed someone to shout at" she tipped her head in the direction of the crucifix "Ah" he smiled "I understand, but I meant literally how are you here, is this where you died?" her eyebrows furrowed obviously not aware of what he meant "It is not a full moon is it?" she shuck her head again "Oh, well I suppose you have no idea what I'm talking about do you"

"No, not really" she couldn't help but smile as he rolled his eyes at himself

"Right well we, as in ghosts, which is what we are, can not go out unless it is a full moon"

"What do you mean, can't go out? Out of where?"

"Well for me it is here, I died right there, he pointed at the alter" she stood up becoming more uncomfortable "Are all ghosts like that" he nodded then a thought struck him "well most, everyone is connected to a building in some way. I am here, which is not too bad, I mean it's roomy and usually full of people."

"How many of 'us' are there" his hand stroked the bottom of his chin as he was thinking "A few, only people who died prematurely, you know not natural causes, everyone meets here on a full moon, it is quite fun actually" she smiled, it never meeting her eyes and she sat back down she saw him drag his hand through his brown hair "How did you…?" he pointed to the crucifix which was hung above the altar "that didn't used to be as well held as it is now" he tapped the top of his head his face grimacing then laughed. He noted the sad look held with in her eyes and his eyes softened immediately "who did you leave behind?" she looked at him confused by the change in question "My parents, brother" he placed his hand over hers his blue eyes holding kindness "No I meant lover, don't worry forty years of being dead has left me open minded, I know you kids don't get married as often as you used too" she smiled at him then looked away "Ashley, and I did marry her" he squeezed her hand "see I knew some people still did" if it was not to do with the contexts of the situation then she may have found his open mindedness out of place, as it were, she was a dead girl in a church talking to a long time dead priest the whole thing seemed entirely reasonable. "Perhaps you are attached to her" there eyes meet again and he held her hand tighter "Why did you come here?" she looked down tears filling her eyes again "I have to allow her to move on, I love her so much, but how can she ever live her life if I don't let her" he nodded

"I have heard of another ghost like you, it seemed such a romanticised view I didn't believe it. He was stuck here too, somewhere else though not L.A., he died when he was newly married he loved his wife so much and she loved him, he stayed with her for the rest of her life until she died then they were reunited" he stood up walking to the alter she saw that it was dawn now and he opened a book hidden on the altar "Perhaps that is what you are, maybe she needs you, but this is the address of a guy who will know, he was the man who told us. I will be honest not the easiest of blokes to talk too but much more knowledgeable. Just call him Mr Smith" he rolled his eyes again, she smiled reading the address on the sheet of paper "Spencer don't be away from her for too long, we are connected to these places so fundamentally we can't even leave until the full moon. There must be a catch for you too" she nodded leaning forward and kissing him on the cheek and began walking out of the church she turned back looking at the man who was now reading from the bible "Do you still believe in it" she asked pointing to the paintings and murals of various moments in Christianities history, he looked at her slight smile on his lips, he nodded his head slightly then read again. She turned and ran from the church having found her answers there after al. l.


	4. Chapter 4

She was thrust into consciousness by the unrestrained banging on her door, followed by shouts from an annoyed male. She sat up groaning at the pain in her head, she made her way to the door tripping over bottles as she went, something niggled at the back of her brain but she couldn't concentrate at the moment she needed to quiet the shouting. She unlocked the door swinging it open "Oh so you remembered to wake up then" she didn't smile she just walked back to the sofa pulling her blanket over her and turning back over.

Glen surveyed the loft, seeing the bottles and the unkempt surroundings "Jesus" he said under his breath making his way too the sofa where Ashley now lay ignoring him.

"Ash? What the hell happened in here?" she didn't make a sound or turn over she just pulled the blanket over herself further "Please Ash what's happened you seemed almost ok yesterday, when you came for lunch?" he realised her wasn't going to get an answer. He moved gathering the empty bottles up cleaning up.

He placed the bottles in the recycling noticing it was empty and he wondered if this was a new thing. He looked over noticed she was shivering and he walked over taking a seat placing his hand on her shoulder "Please Ashley?" the movement was sudden and she turned over into his arms crying desperately. "She's gone".

She looked at the address in her hands making sure she had the right house before she simple walked into the building. She nodded taking a deep breath and strolled up the steps of the rather grand house.

She stood in the reception area looking about unable to see anyone "Mr Smith?" she called a nervous tremor to her voice " Hello?" she walked away from the front door a little "this is stupid" she said feeling that the priest must of misled her in some way she turned around "Oh God it's a blond" she turned around and was faced with a fairly old man hunched over with a book in his hand and glasses on his face "Hello, Mr Smith?" he nodded and indicated for her to follow him, she did so warily.

The place he led her was a library of sorts, though there was no books placed on shelves all of them covered tables and chairs and newspaper clippings everywhere. "Here take a seat" he indicated to a chair and she sat on it, he looked her up and down through pale blue eyes looking over a newspaper

"Well what are you here for blondie?" if it was not for the abrupt was he had asked the question she may have been almost offended by the way he spoke to her

"I was given your address, I was told you may be able to help me, I don't know much about my state"

he chewed on his bottom lips his eyes shifting around the room quickly and awkwardly before stroking the grey beard that sat upon his weathered face.

"Damn priest, wants me to do the introduction speech does he, thinks I have nothing better to do no doubt? See these books" he pointed jaggedly with his hands at the piles that surrounded him and she nodded trying to understand exactly what he was doing, she head him sigh then was in front of her he held her hand sand looked in her eyes. "You. Are. Dead." Then he moved away just as quickly.

She followed him with her eyes as he hand brushed past books, obviously searching for a specific one. She rolled her eyes standing in front of him "I know that"

He looked at her nodding then stared at her momentarily confused, he moved to a calendar that was on the wall then spun round looking her up and down completely baffled.

"It's not a full moon" she nodded her head hoping he was finally getting the point "but you're here" she nodded again, he sat down heavily in front of her "the priest sent you"

"He said you could help me, he thinks I am linked to my wife" he looked blankly at her before a small smile creped on his face "A soul link, I haven't heard of one of those for nearly one hundred years"

He stood up "why aren't you with her" she looked down at her hands still able to bare the feeling of being away from Ashley "I want her to move on"

He slammed his hand on the wooden table causing the books to jump and she was startled "NO!" she looked up "why did you leave her, soul mates don't just part from each other, even death can not separate you, what happened?"

She stuttered something that she had not done since she was a child and nervous away from her mother "We were at my grave, my second anniversary. She said something, she was upset I couldn't make her suffer anymore"

"Children, simply children. Go back to her now, she needs you" Spencer was becoming increasingly angry with being told what to do, she stood up anger filling her "NO! you listen her Mr Smith" she spat out his name "I need answers you will give them now!"

they both stood in silence the air thick with the sudden ending of an argument. Then laughter filled it as the old man doubled over laughing at Spencer e stood up a twinkle in his eyes.

"Very well but then you must go back to her she really does need you"

Glen felt looked out into the sky realising that it was already getting darker, affirming his suspicion that he had been here for some time, simply holding his sister in law. She had eventually stopped crying but her feared asking her anymore question as she has reacted so badly to them before.

He felt the body he was holding move away slightly "Sorry…thank you" he smiled letting the brunette pull away from him, he looked at her trying to find the words he needed to ask her how she was, he needed to do this for his sister.

"Ash what's happening" she looked in his direction but her eyes never held his he could see such sadness held in those eyes, such loss "please Ashley" she looked at him now her eyes seek some answer in his, trying to make out if she could trust him, she stood up moving to the kitchen area and poured herself a glass of water sipping it casually.

"You won't believe me" he stood up now and she could see the hurt in his eyes but he said nothing of this.

"I will, you need to tell someone" she nodded her head folding her arms across her body as tears filled her eyes again "I think Spencer was here".

She looked up his face was a picture of confusion, as the words registered with him he sat back on the sofa hard. "What do you mean?"

"I was having a dream, I've had it most mornings the past years, Spencer is here in the morning she kisses me on the forehead and says…" her voice tears fell and she closed her eyes trying to stop the onslaught of emotion. "She says she loves me"

He nodded his head looking at his hands "I know what you're thinking" he looked at her his eyes gleaming with unshed tears and she was taken a back

"What is it?" he looked down tears falling from his eyes marking his face. She walked over to him sitting next to him "Glen?" his eyes met hers, the pain reflected in them of the loss of someone they loved "Do you think I'm crazy?"

He shuck his head holding her hands desperately "Glen?" she said it again and he took a deep breath "About 3 months after her death, I had come back, mum wasn't coping well and Dad had shut down."

She nodded not truly remembering but knowing it was vaguely familiar "I couldn't sleep, so much emotion, I never was very good at it" he smiled self-deprecatingly "I went into her room, it was the only place in the house which didn't seem devoid of life. I lay on her bed, I was drifting off and I thought I head her voice. I sat up trying to see her but she wasn't there, I thought it was a dream, but it seemed so real"

Silence descended on them momentarily as they tried to take in what they had both admitted to, what they were acknowledging. Glen turned to his sister-in-law a phrase he never thought he would ever use affectionately where she was concerned

"Why has it made you sad, shouldn't it be a good thing she is here?" she noticed the tears coming to her eyes again, but patiently waited for her to speak "I can't feel her any more, she was here all that time, every morning, and I didn't acknowledge it, and now she's gone"

He brought her to him and hugged her letting his own tears flow easily as well, he didn't know what this was, what Spencer was, or where she was, but he knew she had been here, he could sense it in everything he was that she was missing from this place, and no matter what he was going to find out what had happened to her.


	5. Chapter 5

"The day was ordinary, that is what she would always remember, no sign of what was going to happen."

She_ had opened her eyes seeing dishevelled dark hair in front of her and a content smile had graced her features as she pulled her wife into a lazy embrace. _

"_Morning" was the response to her affection, the body moved around and deep brown eyes met her own blue ones "morning, to you too" _

_She lent up and kissed inviting lips, the kiss grew deeper as it inevitable always did, and Spencer moaned as there naked bodies became entangled in a passionate embrace. _

"_What time is it?" Ashley panted out, Spencer ran her hand over her lovers breast and felt the nipple harden into peaks "never mind" Ashley stated too involved in the moment to care about whether or not she would make her morning meeting. _

_Lips trailed down the darker girls neck leaving a fiery blaze in there wake and when a warm moist mouth took in a pebbled nipple her whole body rose off the bed "Oh god" she could feel the blond smiling around the nipple as she nipped it lightly with her teeth. _

_Ashley could feel the orgasm already building up, and she marvelled how even after five years together Spencer could turn her on so quickly. A hand glided effortlessly over her thighs, which began to shake with the expectation of what was to come._

_Ashley groaned as it brushed over wet lips but never went to where she needed it most _

"_God you are so wet" whispered Spencer laughing as an exasperated sigh that left Ashley's mouth, the blond kissed her chin lovingly, she saw the almost pained expression on the brunette face and understood the frustration._

_She gave in to the guttural moans that came from Ashley's mouth and two fingers swiftly entered her lover. Ashley eyes opened wide at the sensation of suddenly being filled by her wife she closed them again, when she felt a thumb brush over her clit "Spencer…" _

_She was panting as she felt the orgasm nearing its peak, quickly and succulently "Ashley open your eyes" through the passion filled haze her mind was in these words drifted though her subconscious and it took a moment to understand them, when she did she opened them quickly and was met with deep blue pools, radiating love and acceptance, and she fell over the precipice._

_Her hips rose off the bed as the walls of her vagina tightened around Spencer's fingers as if she was trying to consume the girl she loved more than anything._

_Then their lips met again as the last few ripples of the powerful orgasm ripped through her body, she felt the fingers withdraw from her body and the walls contracted again saddened by their loss. She looked at Spencer seeing her lick her fingers greedily "God, what you do to me" she said it in a almost whisper but she new Spencer had heard her "Anytime"._

_Spencer leant forward and here lips met this time in a loving kiss suddenly the warmth was gone from her side and she saw her lover searching in the draw next to the bed "Baby, what are you doing?" _

_Her hand trailed down Spencer's spine feeling the girl shiver slightly causing Ashley to smirk "Well you can't be the only one to have fun" Spencer turned over and brought a strap on with her, Ashley eyes went comically wide "Really?" she asked, desperately hoping Spencer wouldn't change her mind._

"_Yeah, but what time is your meeting" Spencer laughed at the pout that appeared on Ashley's face "that soon hey?" _

_She laughed when Ashley shuck her head in profound disagreement "We will just have to keep it for tonight then won't we" she leant forward kissing her wife, her beautifully childish wife "You are not leaving this bed, without coming!" Ashley said "What about my reputation?" _

_Spencer laughed and put the equipment down turning over and met her wife in a passionate kiss "Baby I ruined you reputation years ago"._

_Ashley look aghast at the suggestion "well we will have to put that right won't we" she flipped her wife over so she was on top, kissing her desperately, biting and licking breathing in Spencer's moans and gasps. _

_She moved her hand to the apex between Spencer's legs and felt the wetness liberally coating strong thigh, there was no preamble she thrust to fingers into her wife "Ashley, oh fuck"._

_she smiled enjoying the naughtier side of her wife. She kissed red lips and moved down a sweat covered body, she breathed in the smell of her lovers arousal and sighed before dipping her tongue in the wetness she found there, the thighs either side of her head were shaking and she brushed along them before moving under buttocks so she had a better angle. _

_She could sense that Spencer was near to her own release the pants and shaking, the profanity all mingled together as she took the protruding clit into her mouth sucking it lovingly, the was a gasp above her as her wife came her name shouted from passionate lips, her mouth coated in warm juices which she greedily devoured. _

_They lay together content with the silence that followed their love making, the ringing of a phone roused them "I guess that will be the record company, wanting to know what time I'll get there"._

_Spencer looked over to the phone wishing that it could be silent "I guess so, suppose we should get, I can not be the one leading you astray" she smiled leaning her head and kissing Ashley's nipple "Spence…" the brunette panted wanting desperately to continue their love making but knowing they both had to get up, work was sometimes a bitch._

"_I know" Spencer sat up and grabbed the phone tossing it to Ashley "Answer that, then get in the shower, I'll make breakfast" Brown eyes sparkled as they followed her wife to their kitchen "I love you" _

"_You better" was the reply, she grinned to herself and answered the phone. _

_The warm spray of water covered her aching body, she loved this feeling, the ache from their lovemaking was one of her favourite feelings, and she grinned as she noticed slight teeth marks on her upper thigh. _

_It was two weeks till their anniversary and she wondered what they would do for it, Spencer always planned these things, way to in advance for her to keep up with. _

_She needed to plan something herself this year, she new Spencer didn't mind when she got something less than perfect but she wished she could make it perfect just once._

_She turned the shower off pulling a warmed cotton towel around her body, as she stepped into their bedroom she could smell something burning, she pulled a t-shirt over her body and some pants, _

"_Hey baby, you left the grill on again" she listened out for Spencer's reply waiting for a sarcastic come back, but her listening ears were met with silence. _

"_Spence?" she shouted a little louder this time, wondering if her wife had been distracted by the morning paper, she would of inevitably picked up from there matt._

_She opened their bedroom door smiling "baby" she said in a sing-song voice as she entered the kitchen, "baby…" the blood in her body turned to ice, smoke poured from under the grill, but that was not where her eyes were held, transfixed. _

"_Spencer!?!" she shouted propelling herself forward on her knees as she grasped at her wife who was lying on the floor face first, she pulled her up on to her lap stroking her face gently "Baby, you've left the grill on" she hugged her to her, looking into blue eyes that were looking unseeing at the ceiling. _

"_Spencer…SPENCER!?!" she shouted shaking her slapping her on the face in desperation "sorry… oh god sorry…I don't know what to do, baby tell me…for gods sake wake up and tell me!". _

_Her mind scrambled to come to up with an answer she saw a phone on the floor, Spencer's, she grabbed for it, and flipped it open, dialling a number she had never used before. _

"_911, what's the emergency" _

"_My, my wife she has collapsed" _

"_Okay ma'am what's your address" _

"_Fourth and west Apartment 17" _

"_The Ambulance is on its way, is your wife breathing?" _

"_Oh god, she isn't…there isn't any…she was fine" _

"_Please ma'am you need to calm down, can you check to see if there is a pulse for me" _

"_Yes I can… I can't feel one…there isn't anything…Spencer baby, please" _

"_Ma'am you need to blow air into her lungs and start compressions on her chest, pinch her nose and cover her mouth with yours, then four compression onto her chest" _

"_Ok, (breath) 1, 2, 3, 4"_

"_That's right keep on doing it"_

"_1, 2, 3, 4…Please…Baby…please" _

"_Right ma'am they are coming up your stairs now you should the door any minute"_

"_They're here" _

_Ashley left he wife and ran over to the door panting with the exertion of breathing for two, she opened the door not greeting the two men who stood at there, they followed her not expecting a friendly welcome. _

_The first one to reach Spencer knelt down and felt her pulse "Mike we need the diffib" the other man slightly taller put the equipment down "Please help her please" _

_Ahsley looked at the scene in front of her, her mind going blank "Right charging…Clear" he pressed the pads to her wife's chest and she saw the jolt go threw her body, she willed herself to remain calm, she knew that Spencer would need her to be relaxed when she woke up, why wasn't she waking up?_

_They placed the pads again she lent against the wall hugging her legs to herself not knowing what she needed to do to make this change to make this okay again "Spencer…" _

_She whispered as a salty tear ran over her lips, her eyes clouded now from the crying. _

_Time seemed to stop as she covered her ears trying not to hear the noise of the machine and her wife's body contorting momentarily, over and over again. _

_Then she felt a hand on her shoulder the first paramedic looked at her as the other was looking at his watch writing something down "I am so sorry, miss" she looked into his kind eyes and shuck her head "no…" she looked over at her wife who lay still as she had done before then back at the man in front of her "there is nothing we can do, it's been half an hour Ma'am" she said nothing not understanding what that meant._

"_What have I told you two about safety…this is LA, not…" she looked up noting the surrealness of the moment blue eyes so familiar looked a hers "Oh god" she pushed herself onto her knees trying desperately to get to her wife, knowing that Spencer would not want her mum to see her in this half dressed state. _

_The scream that came from Paula's lips a plea of a mother to her child went unheard. The paramedic held Ashley back, she looked at him confused "you don't understand" he held her she started to struggle against needing desperately to let Spencer no her mother was here. _

"_I'm so, so, sorry" she turned to him her eyes angry, she hit him on the chest to let her go, he didn't relent even though it must of hurt "Get off me, get off me, SPENCER!"_

_She turned around seeing Arthur for the first time, holding his wife who was shaking and sobbing, the pain to intense for her to focus, then she looked back to her wife saw the other paramedic pulling a sheet over her face "No…NO!!…" Her knees buckled her stomach rolling and she dry heaved on the floor_.

Spencer looked at the man who she had been describing her death too, she had left out some details, he had tears in his eyes, he stepped up moving around the room placing a book back on the shelf.

He turned around having composed himself "Do you know what it was?" she brushed away an errant tear, remembering that moment always caused her to cry, the look on Ashley's face as she had come from the bedroom destroyed her every time she thought of it.

"My heart stopped. Apparently I had had a heart condition for years but I never knew no one did, mum could never forgive herself for that" she swallowed the lump that was in her throat at the seemingly injustice of it all.

"Ashley is keeping you here, she needs you, naturals…" he could tell by her face that she did not understand this word "People who died of natural causes, well they never remain here unless the are being kept by someone, you need to go back to her"

She nodded knowing he spoke the truth, she walked to the door "Will I ever…" she swallowed hard "will I ever go from here, find peace?" he looked into her eyes, sadly wanting to be of more help than he was he nodded his head "If she lets you, otherwise you will remain here till her death" she nodded and made her way out of the building needing desperately to return home


	6. Chapter 6

Glen and Ashley remained on the sofa taking comfort in the personal contact, but the moment was ruined by the incessant ringing of Glen's phone, he reached into his pocket causing Ashley to move away from him with a sad smile on her features.

He flipped it open, "Hey… yeah still at Ashley's…I don't know mum…ok I'll ask" he looked at her sympathy plastered on his face, he covered the mouth piece though it was futile "Mum wants to know if you would like to come for dinner?"

She shuck her head and moved over to get another glass of water to soothe her sore throat.

"She said yeah, we will be there in thirty" he snapped the phone shut and she turned to him glaring he put his hands up to defend against the attack.

"Look you know as well as I do, that if mum thinks you are getting bad again, she will be here in ten minutes, and I am sure you don't want that."

She nodded looking tired, truly not wanting to go out "I know, but what if she comes back and I'm not here"

He stood up so he was in front of her and placed his hand gently on her shoulder "then she'll do what Spencer always does, she'll wait for you" he smiled as he said this, something she easily reciprocated and she let him draw her in to another hug.

"Now get dressed you look like hell" she hit him scowling before moving off into her bedroom to do what he said.

Spencer walked up the stairs of their apartment; not hurrying like she had when she left John smith's house. Outside she had noticed the lights had been off, so Ashley must not be there.

She was partly pleased by this, even though she had missed her wife terribly over the past couple of days. Ashley's absence gave her the time to test out, what John Smith had told her, before he had asked her to relate how she had died;

"_You are not like us, you are not confined like we are, you should be able to move things whenever you want" _

She had argued with him, made it clear she had tried but he had ignored her, so she knew she would have to at least try to touch things.

She needed to let Ashley know she was there.

She walked through the door entering the darkened apartment, she looked at the light switch willing her body to be able to turn it on, but her fingers kept going threw it, and she gave up getting to frustrated.

She walked over to the sofa noting how unkempt it was, she wondered if Ashley would ever sleep in their bed again, she sighed, sitting on the sofa.

Her mind wandered to there life together, how their last day had been so unexpectedly short and she remembered not saying '_I love you too'_ back when she had had the chance, she wished she had known she had but minutes to live, so she could of said it instead of a smart reply.

She saw the picture of herself on the table it felt like it was mocking her, it had only been taken two days before her death;

"This place never changes does it?" Ashley turned to look at Spencer who was gazing out at the ocean, the words she had spoken almost lost on the breeze "No, it doesn't" she replied as Spencer met her eyes and leaned forward kissing her gently on the mouth.

"You know what else doesn't change" she saw Ashley shake her head at the question and she wrapped her arms around her wife's waist "Us, this is where we had our first date, and I am still as obsessed as ever"

She leaned forward the lips meet in a more passionate kiss this time, when she pulled away she saw the loving gaze in Ashley's eyes, she realised, it was more the brunette, who said the loving words and she promised herself she would say them more often.

"I love you Spencer"

"_I love you too, Ash, more than anything" she felt Ashley pick the camera up she had in her bag and she smiled, tilting her head to the side as the photo was taken._

"_There we go, now we will always have this, so I can show it you how much you love me when you moan at me for not washing up properly" she laughed slapping Ashley on the arm lightly. _

Spencer felt the tears run down her face, and she brushed them away angrily, not wanting to cry now. She was angry that she never lived up to her promise never said loving words to her wife again, she hadn't been given the chance, but she should of said it every day.

She walked over to the picture hating suddenly that moment; it became such a lie.

She walked over to it and smacked it with her hand "WHY?" then she stopped hearing the smash of glass as it collided with the wall; she stared at her hand, then at the photo frame that was smashed on the floor, she had moved it.

"Shit", she said nervously brushing her hand through her hair, _John Smith was right she could touch things_. The only problem was now.

Was how to repeat it?

Spencer looked angrily at the photo frame on the floor; the frustration she had been feeling for the past two hours was not helping her.

She tired to figure out how had she done it, what had caused her to be able to move the frame.

She had become angry again, trying to see if that was the reason she had succeeded.

She began to think of things that irked her, but it made no difference, and the frustration was beginning to make her blood boil, so she knew that it couldn't be anger alone.

She looked at the clock 11.00pm Ashley would be home relatively soon, and she didn't want her to find the photo frame on the floor, smashed up.

She sat on the sofa trying to see if anything else worked she stared at object in front of her, a shell that they had picked up from their honeymoon.

Her hand went through it again, she sighed then a small smile crept across her face as she remembered how they came to have it;

"This one" Ashley picked up another shell showing it to Spencer who shuck her head then smiled as the brunette released an aggravate sigh.

"Please Ash" she smirked again at the eye roll, but Ashley didn't stop her hunt through the shells that were liberally placed around the beach.

"This one" it was met with another headshake and this time Ashley was getting angry "Spencer" she said in a whiny voice causing Spencer to draw the women into a kiss.

"I know Ash, you don't want to be doing this". The brunette shuck her head disagreeing "No this" she said indicating their current position in each other's arms "is fine, in fact it is what I want to be doing. This however…" her hand indicated the shell she had just plopped back onto the beach "is not".

Spencer pouted and Ashley rolled her eyes again "Oh that's fair using your secret weapon against me".

The blond smirked again "I know you want to be eating exotic foods and drinking champagne but we need something to take back with us, to remember our honeymoon by"

Ashley shuck her head and kissed her wife, god she loved saying that, wife "No I don't need anything to remember this by," she said matter-of-factly" I will have you, I don't need any other reminder" she could see by the blush that made its way up Spencer's face that the sweet talk was working.

"But if my wife wants a extremely unique shell, that we have to spend hours searching the beach for, who am I to argue"

The smile that lit up the blonds face was worth the sacrifice of hunting for shells, in fact, she dare not suggest it but, she would hunt on this beach for the rest of her life if that smile stayed in place.

"Thank-you" Spencer grasped onto Ashley's hand rubbing her thumb idly on the back of a tanned hand, she saw a shell a hundred yards from them, and ran to it Ashley laughing and following her.

"This is the one" Ashley smiled picking it up and placing it next to Spencer's ear "Can you hear the sea baby?" the blue eyed girl nodded and she pulled the brunette to her kissing her passionately.

Spencer froze trying not to become too excited, she had the shell in her hands.

She had picked it up, while remembering her wife. She was truly holding on to something.

She could feel it slipping through her hand like water and she tried desperately to hold onto it.

"Do it for Ashley, for Ashley" she commander herself, her mind remembering her wife, how she used to smile. The way her face lit up whenever Spencer would enter the room, she remembered it all.

And she held on to the shell.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys sorry this one has taken so long, I would make some kind of excuse but the bottom line is I am a bit crap...la la la. I was struck by a small amount of writers bloke, and glandular fever, the first of which was actually more frustrating. Thank-you to everyone who has reviewed it really does make my day, and especially to those of you who have reviewed on nearly every chapter, you people are extremely flattering, though obviously I like the ego boost so I will stop pretending to be modest .cough. Hope you have a very good day and enjoy this part... **

The Carlin household was once again filled with the hustle and bustle of an evening meal, Glen sat with Chelsea who had turned up unexpected with their children, who had been missing their father.

Ashley sat next to Paula who was laughing at something little Clay had said, and she realised how much love this family must have to survive two members deaths, she felt almost selfish not being able to move on from one.

She looked at Glen he was kissing Chelsea on the lips tenderly and she suddenly hated him for what he had, for what she had lost.

she couldn't be here anymore with all this life.

She stood up suddenly causing everyone to look at her, she felt embarrased "I... I need the bathroom" Arther nodded almost excusing her.

she walked up the stairs closing the door breathing heavily she slipped down the door sitting down hugging her knees, willing the tears not to come, for her to be grief free if only for a couple of hours.

She heard a light knocking on the door "Ashley?" she wiped her eyes not wanting Paula to see her upset, she opened the bathroom door.

"Hey Paula, can a girl not pee in peace any more?" she said smiling not able to meet the blue eyes which were too familiar "Of course" the silence hung between them and Ashley knew that Paula had not finished speaking.

"Ashley...if there was something wrong, I would hope you'd tell me" Ashley nodded then made the mistake of looking at her, Paula always had that way of making her be honest.

"there is actually" she could see the women visibly brace herself, and she knew she couldn't tell her the truth "I don't feel well, a think I must of drank a little too much last night, but I really wanted to come, I had a good time yesterday."

Paula drew the brunette in for a hug, and she speculated on the reason this family seemed to do this so often, even though she welcomed it,it was an almost cruel reminder of what she lost.

"I'll get Arther to take you home, with soup of course" Ashley rolled her eyes causing Paula to laugh.

"No it's fine, I want to stay" she said as convincing as possible, "After all it was my own doing"the smile that came across Paula's face was worth the white lie, and she returned to the family meal, composing her emotions for the rest of the evening.

The car pulled up outside the apartment, "thanks for the lift" he smiled at her, passing the soup that Paula had made "No worries. Promise me though if you need to talk, give us a ring"

She smiled and nodded getting out without saying anything, she looked up at the building sighing deeply, hoping against hope that she would feel Spencer there hugging her arms to herself in a subconscious protective gesture

. She made her way into the building heart beating faster than usual, her feet seemed to drag, she didn't know how she would react if the apartment still felt empty.

She jumped as her phone buzzed in her pocket and she answered it as she got into the elevator. "Hello?"

"hey Ash, it's me" she recognised her sisters voice straight away and she smiled at the nervousness in that voice "Hey, what's up?"

"Nothing, just heard you went to the club yesterday, wondering why I didn't get an invite?" the voice was playful despite the words, and it caused Ashley to smile despite her worry.

"Well you know I do have friends apart from you" she said opening her door while laughing with her sister "Yeah right".

She didn't say anything back to her sister, she had flicked the light on and noticed immediately the warmth of the place, and she could see something in the corner.

She began to make her way towards it "Ash? Hey are you there?" she remembered the phone call she was involved in "Hey, yeah sorry can I call you tomorrow? I am really tired" she heard an 'of course' as she hit the red button ending the call.

She stood there in the middle of the room immobilized all of a sudden, by what this could all mean.

She walked towards it like it was the only thing visible in the room she stood in front of it unable to move, her hand reached out shaking so violently she had to stop and draw it back.

She closed her eyes breathing out, then her hand reached and picked it up, she looked at it rubbed her thumb over its cool exterior looking at it like it was a diamond, rather than a simple pebble sitting on a small piece of paper in front of a broken picture frame.

She picked up the paper reading the one word over and over, the word that was in hand writing she knew far to well, hand writing that used to leave her notes all the time, a simple word, but with so much meaning it broke her heart and filled it at the same time. _"_

_Sorry" _she whispered the word to herself her tears falling freely as a laugh was brought from her lips, she sunk to the ground overwhelmed with joy, her love was back. "It's okay Spencer, it's okay" as she sunk to the ground holding the pebble to her heart.

The blond had held an unnecessary breath when she had seen Ashley enter their apartment she had nearly cried when her wife had noticed her presence immediately.

She had tried to think of a way to break it to her love that she was here, a way that wouldn't scare her.

She had thought of the pebble only at the last minute needing something to keep the paper on the table with and she had smiled and cried when she had seen Ashley's reaction.

She knelt next to her now as she cried, and when she was spoken to she cried harder the relief of finally being acknowledged.

Her hand reached out and stroked Ashley's face who flinched, causing her to immediate;y withdraw it "Spencer?" her name was whispered so delicately it felt like Ashley was keeping it preserved on her tongue.

"Yeah Ash it's me" she moved her hand back, she could tell Ashley had not heard her, as there had been no reaction, but she knew she felt this as the brunettes eyes closed and her head lent into the touch.

Another hand meet her own as if Ashley was trying to convince herself this was real she felt down Spencer's arm.

"Oh god, I'm not mad" Spencer laughed and drew Ashley into a hug, the tears fell freely from brown eyes, this was what she had been missing, this moment more than any other.

Spencer looked at the window noting it was far too late for Ashley to be awake again, she pulled back.

"No, please Spencer hold me...please" the voice was broken and needy, but Spencer wanted her love to sleep, she pulled her up and Ashley went willingly.

Then smiled as she realised Spencer was taking her into her bedroom "Will you hold me...I don't think I'll sleep tonight, if you don't"

"Always, I always have" the yes was indicated by a simple squeezing of the arm, Ashley lay down after taking off her shirt and jeans, Spencer lay along side her holding her through the night.


	8. Chapter 8

Ashley opened her eyes and smiled kissing the arms of her wife which were lovingly wrapped around her.

Her skin contrasted so beautifully her slightly olive skin looked almost ugly in comparison to Spencer's just sun kissed look.

She sat up, the memories flooding into her conscious turning around looking at the face of her wife, who blinked with shock.

"What?" Spencer asked stroking her hand down Ashley's arm, who closed her eyes the tears falling from them. "Don't cry baby, I'm right here, right here" Ashley nodded opening her eyes again and Spencer realized she was being looked at directly.

"you can see me" she said a smile eagerly placing itself on her face, a smile Ashley had missed with a painful ache.

"Yes"

"And hear me"

"Yes" Ashley pulled her wife to her kissing her mouth hungrily as if trying to prove to herself it was all real.

She pushed Spencer down onto the bed kissing her neck "Can I make love to you?" she asked between panting and kissing.

"I really wish you would" Spencer whispered out wanting nothing more in this moment.

* * *

Ashley woke up this time alone and she shot out of bed, looking desperately for her wife "Spencer?" she spoke to the silent apartment.

There was no answer "SPENCER?" she shouted out again, her eyes filled with tears which fell gracelessly down her face.

She heard a key in the door, and the door opened her wife walked in with a bag of shopping. And looked startled at her wife's appearance.

"Ashley?" she asked with confusion, and the scared and angry look on the brunette's face.

"You just left! Where were you? I was all alone?" Spencer placed the bag down on the kitchen side and walked up to her wife.

Knowing these words were more than just about the shopping trip. "You needed food, I went to get you some"

"But you just left! I didn't even get chance to say good bye, there was no sign nothing..." her voice was breaking with the sobs, the desperate pleading.

"How could you just go?" that was it, it was too much and the guttural pain tore from her throat forcing her knees to give out.

Spencer pulled her wife into her arms rocking her as she cried "I know, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry...forgive me"

the tears started to ebb a little and Ashley was able to look in the blue eyes she knew so well, "please don't leave me"

Spencer nodded "I won't, not while you still need me"

"Then you shall never go, because I will always need you" she smiled up at her soul mate who reciprocated with a tilt of her head.

"What did you get?" crises over for the moment Spencer pulled away but held onto Ashley's hand

"Just some milk, and bread you were running low"

"How did you get it, can everyone see you?" Spencer looked a little sheepish at Ashley who smiled playfully "Spencer Davies did you steal this"

the look of outrage that coloured the Blonds features made her laugh out loud. "No! I left money on the counter... I always do it" Ashley smiled as she watched Spencer put the things that she had bought away in the fridge.

"Was it always you?" Spencer halted looking around seeing the conflict in deep chestnut eyes she nodded lowering her head.

"I'm sorry, I didn't take very good care of myself"

"No you didn't" she could hear the reprimand in the loving voice "but I wouldn't of faired much better"

"I'm glad you didn't" Spencer looked at her curiously "the pain it's so overwhelming I would never want you to go through that" Spencer nodded and moved towards her wife holding her hand.

"Why did you leave?" the voice was so quiet Spencer wondered if she had actually heard it "not when...when you died" brown eyes closed and swallowed back the tears threatening to fall.

"I thought I was the reason you couldn't move on" Ashley looked at her again and her eyes were filled with hurt and a small amount of anger. "Why would you thin that?" she snapped knowing she spoke to harshly.

Spencer kissed the girls knuckles not wanting her to know she had heard the words she spoke at the grave side. "It doesn't matter now, I was wrong"

"Yes it does, I need to know, please" Spencer sighed and lent forward to kiss her love again.

"I was at the graveside, on my anniversary, I heard you what you said " Ashly's face was filled with confusion "You wondered ' if you would have tried so hard knowing that it would end up being so painful', I didn't want you to suffer any more"

Ashley lowered her eyes "So you thought you would help by leaving me all alone"

"NO!" Ashley stood up walking away from her lover the anger clouding over any other emotion.

"I was hurting, I was upset, it was you god damn anniversary. Two years since you dies...just died... of something stupid. We were both do young, do you not think I am allowed to grieve to miss you. Do you think you have the right to punish me for my emotions"

"No, of course not, Ash, it wasn't like that"

"You think you have the right you always do. To know what's best to do it without thinking about anyone, just being the martyr... I hate you!" her eyes widened with shock, both of theirs did, she saw tears filling blue eyes and the old familiar feeling of guilt washed over her.

"I'm sorry I didn't..."

"Yes you did, and you're right, but I couldn't do it any more. For two years I was here in this hell not able to help you, my mother, my whole family, destroyed with grief. It was like being in hell, caught here but unable to talk to anyone.... You drank yourself to sleep every night crying blaming me for leaving you. I love you Ash, I don't want to see you do it... so at the grave side, when you said what you did, it was like a sign that I should leave, let me be in my own personal hell alone and destroyed but at least you could try and live."

Ashly sat down on the edge of the coffee table "I don't hate you" Spencer smiled and sat next to her "I know"

"I'm just so scared" Spencer enveloped her in a hug.

"Why?"

"of everything...that the anger won't go, the pain, or that I'll wake up and you being here with me is a dream and I still have to face the rest of my life without you"

"I told you I won't leave you, while you need me"

"You did before, I know it wasn't your choice to die, but you still had to go. I can't be without you Spencer. Everyone kept telling me it would get easier, but it never did it just got worse. I kept forgetting things, your voice, the way your eyes lit up when you smiled. It was like every morning I was losing a bit more of you again." tears flooded her eyes "Damn it why can't I stop crying"

"You never lost me Ashley, ever, you're too pig headed for that" Ashly laughed and the tension eased somewhat.

The argument over with they both settled down to breakfast, mainly Ashley of course, but Spencer read the paper.

"You always made the best pancakes" Spencer smiled.

"You only say that because you love to eat them, but hate to make them." Ashley grinned.

Spencer looked at her wife sensing there was another question that she wanted to answer, she placed a hand over the one that was idly playing with a knife.

"Ashley what is it" the brunette looked up a question burning in her eyes.

"Why did you come back, I mean what made you change your mind about leaving me?"

"Actually, that is an interesting question, it was a priest and a ...well someone with a far to ordinary name" she smiled and Ashley was drawn in.

she recounted the tale and Ashley sat perfectly quiet through out all of it, when Spencer had finished Ashley stood up and knelt before her girlfriend, kissing the palm of her hand and placing t against her cheek.

"Thank-you so much, for coming back to me, for not resenting me for placing you here" Spencer blinked surprised by the emotion. She drew Ashley up kissing her passionately.

"There is no place in heaven or earth that I would rather be than in your arms"


	9. Chapter 9

Spencer sat on the window ledge looking over the city that up until two weeks ago she had walked through alone.

Ashley sat behind her the light scraping of a pen on paper the only sign that she was doing something beside staring.

The ringing of a telephone broke through their silence and Ashley sighed bringing the phone out of her pocket.

Spencer frowned slightly as her wife simply disconnected the call and returned to her sketching.

"Who was that?"

Ashley went back to her sketching dismissing the question.

"Don't move, I'll loose my prospective." she ignored the indignant look that crossed Spencer's features.

"It was no one" she said in a whisper

"Ashley?" the deep sigh that fell from the brunettes lips was an indication that she was not happy with this interruption from their afternoon together.

"It was Kyla" The blond walked over towards Ashley, sitting on her lap pulling the pad from her hands. Looking at the drawing admiringly.

"I always thought I was my most beautiful through your eyes." the sentiment caused the brunette to uncharacteristically, blush.

"You're beautiful through everyones eyes" they sat like that for a moment Ashley's head nestled into the side of Spencer's neck. Both reveling in the comfort that for far too long had been denied.

They were again interrupted by the ringing of Ashley's phone, who rolled her eyes as Spencer reach to the side where it had been places minutes before. "Answer" she said clicking the accept button as she passed it over.

"Hey Kyla" she said as she gave Spencer 'the look' for causing this event, it just caused her to laugh lightly and make her way back over to the window.

"I was in the bathroom" A blatant lie, and Spencer smiled at how bad Ashley was at that, "I can't I'm afraid" the smile now gone a from worried her features.

"I have to finish a piece for work, desperate deadline" this lie was more believable and it caused Spencer's jovial mood to completely dissipate.

"I'm fine Kyla... honestly...Kyla, please stop nagging. I am fine." Spencer turned around and looked at her lover, who had begun to make her way into the adjacent room, so that the call wouldn't be overheard.

A few minutes later she heard Ashley's footsteps come back into the room, and felt strong arms encircling her waist, despite her annoyance, she still found the action enjoyable.

"Now are you going ti sit here quietly, while I finish my sketch?" Spencer shuck her head, turning as she did so, in those strong arms.

"Did Kyla want you to go somewhere?" Ashley looked entirely to cute when she was looking sheepish, Spencer mused, but was determined not to let her resolve break. "Where?"

"It's no big deal. I'd rather stay in with you tonight Spence... if Kyla knew she would understand"

"she can't know though Ash, and she will never understand, she will just worry. In fact if you ever told her she would probably think you had had a breakdown" they both smiled a little at that.

"At least if was in the nut house no one would bother us." Spencer laughed and kissed her delicately.

"You should go, you have been cooped up here with me for two weeks, they are going to think you are a hermit. What is it really?" Ashley started to shift and Spencer knew she was starting to become uncomfortable.

"Please...?" one look from those blue eyes told her there would be no excuses this time.

"Fine... Madison's bar is reopening, and they have a private booth to send Glen off in style.

"Nothing Huh?" Ashley couldn't even bring herself to smile, she just tensed in Spencer's embrace. "Call Kyla back, you should really go"

"No, I want to stay here and finished sketching, it will just be full of drunk people trying to get laid... please don't make me leave you" she said in a whisper, looking down trying to keep her emotions in check.

"Who sad anything about leaving, I want to come too, you ain't going there without me " the smile that lit Ashley's face made Spencer's heart sore.

"I've told you, I'm here to stay" she lent forward kissing the brunette assuringly.

"No talking to me though... or they really will think you have gone nuts" they laughed now the heart to heart over for now.

Ashley pulled out her phone and called her sister "Hey, it looks as if I do have a free night, still want me to come?"

Spencer smiled at the squeal on the other end of the phone and lent forward kissing her wife on the cheek.

The group of four made their way up the stairs of the newly refurbished night club, Spencer hadn't been here for some time, though she recognised it as being much the same. And wondered what the point was of spending so much money painting the place, when it was always dark in here.

She wore the same as before, but Ashley had changed it to one of her going out outfits, a black short sleeved top, which they had spent at least an hour picking out. Accompanied with a short, dark blue denim skirt.

She walked in silence behind the other three, Aiden first, followed by Kyla who was holding onto his hand tightly, Ashley, then her. She realised as they neared the top that Ashley had a particular swagger to her hips.

One she had not used since the early days of their relationship when she had used the method to drive Spencer mad and hopefully induce a favorable reaction in the bedroom. The effect was working just as well now.

She brought out of her musings by the shouts of hello from above, and she looked up just in time to she her wife swamped by members of her family. Paula stood beside Ashley her eyes glistening with joy.

"We didn't know if you''d come" Ashley at least looked a little sheepish at that, and Spencer grinned knowingly.

"Well I couldn't miss this could I " Paula grinned at hugged her again.

"Come on mum you're going to cut of vital blood supply" Glen grinned as he was slapped on the arm

"Who wants a drink?" Aiden announced trying to get the attention away from his friend who was starting to look uncomfortable.

The drinks were orders were given, Ashley just having a coke, a request which earned a hand squeeze from her wife and smile off of her sister.

They sat around a large white table leaving a vacant place next to Ashley which Spencer squeezed into and they talked, catching up and gossiping over drinks.

Half way through a discussion on the new refurbishment, Ashley felt Spencer's hand on her leg drawing distracting circles on her inner thigh. "God you look hot tonight" the warm air that tickled her ear made her mouth go try and fluid flood in her underwear.

"If we were at home now, I would ravish you" Even though no one could hear her, her voice was still whispered the words rumbling from her mouth.

"Here you go Ashley" A new drink was put in front of them and Spencer withdrew her hand, and Ashley shuddered at the loss.

"Thanks Aid"

"You OK Ashley? You look a little flushed" this was Paula and she nodded her head, even though it was the almost opposite of how she was feeling but how could you say 'no, your dead daughter keeps touching me up, and it's making me feel really horny' without coming across as just a little crazy.

"Yeah, sorry I am fine I just need the bathroom" Their private VIP toilet was pointed out to her and she stood smiling shoving Spencer with her shoulder, subtly.

"Do you want me to come with?" Kyla stood as if to follow

"NO!" she realised this was out of proportion and closed her eyes trying to compose herself "I mean, no, I will just be a minute, it's been a while since I've been in a place this populated, I just need a minute to myself OK?"

Kyla nodded and held her hand, then bringing her into a hug "Thank-you for coming tonight, take your time, and if it gets to much just tell me and we will go"

"I will, but I really am fine, thank-you"

she headed towards the bathroom Spencer again following her wife, feeling bad for putting Ashley into the position where she had to lie to her sister. Ashley held the bathroom door open just a one person bathroom, but nicely done out.

Ashley made sure the bathroom, however small, was empty. The silence was getting to much for Spencer and she was worried Ashley may be mad at her. "Look I'm sorry, You just look really hot, and this whole 'no one but you being able to see me thing', just has me a little more adventurous then I probably should be.

Ashley said nothing with her hands on her hips staring right at her, Spencer babbled more until Ashley put her hand up.

"Spencer shut up!" the blond did though she looked a little startled "Will you come here and ravish me already, or I will not be able to go back out there" Spencer smiled and moved to Ashley pulling her closer.

Their lips met in a frenzied dual and Ashley pulled Spencer's top over her head, they fell back onto a sofa which had been placed in the bathroom, which Ashley had never been more glad of.

Ashley sat on top her legs either side of the blonds hips she pulled her top off and lent back onto her wife . Spencer flipped them and moved her fingers to Ashley's underwear "I think we should make this quick otherwise Kyla might feel the need to come see if you're OK, and we might have to stop."

Ashley's eyes opened wide at the realization and she pulled her bra off quickly as Spencer slowly moved the underwear over beautifully smooth legs. She knelt down and blew on her wifes sex, causing Ashley to buck "Fuck"

"SSHH, otherwise they will wonder what the hell you are doing" Spencer moved up kissing Ashley again her hands brushing the inside legof an increasingly frustrated Ashley "Jesus Spencer" she touched a twitching clit and her eyes went wide "God you're really wet"

"Uh huh" Ashley said distracted and her hips rose and she licked her lips closing her eyes. Spencer heard noise outside footsteps and she quickened her pace realizing they may be interrupted "God I think this is going to be embarrassingly quick" panted Ashley as the feeling mounted within her.

Spencer grinned at the statement and kissed Ashley hard as she bucked the orgasm swamping her. The footsteps passed and she realised they must have been a staff member going outside for a smoke.

Ashley opened her eyes and smiled at the blond "Dear god, never do that to me again... in front of people"she added at the end, causing Spencer to laugh and then kissed her lovingly.

"I won't, I didn't realize how it would effect you" Ashley looked incredulous

"What my normally, wholesome wife feeling me up and talking dirty in a club, you thought THAT would have no effect" she grinned and Spencer frowned a little.

Ashley moved and kissed her on the lips "I'm only joking, I loved it, and Spencer you only need to look at me in a certain way and I get turned on, really, this. Was. Awesome."

"Really? Just one look?" Ashley pulled her underwear on and her top and looked at Spencer.

"Of course? Was there any doubt? Spencer you are my whole world" Spencer smiled and nodded her head.

"I always knew that, I knew you loved me, always. I just never realised I turned you on so much" Ashley looked shocked.

"What? How could you not?"

there was a thud at the door "Ashley, are you OK? you've been ages" Ashely looked angrily at the door but tried to reign it in.

"I'm fine, just give me a couple more moments, and then I feel like dancing"

" as long as you are sure you are OK?"

"Yeah honest" she heard footsteps as Kyla made her way back to the others.

Spencer had her arms folded over her chest and she was looking down "I think we should carry on this conversation at home, it's no big deal OK, I love you, we just made...well we had good dirty sex" she grinned and Ashley copied the gesture.

"Ok... erm Spence"

"yeah?"

"I didn't just tell Kyla I would dance did I?" Spencer laughed and rolled her eyes as they went back to join the party.


	10. Chapter 10

Spencer stood on outside of the VIP area watching Ashley dance with Kayla, she knew her wife would never admit it but she was definitely enjoying herself.

Paula and Arther had left moments before, complaining about being old and babysitters, she had smiled as they left, and wished she could of hugged them also, she missed her mum and dad.

She heard mumbling behind her and Glen stood up taking out a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and made his way to the courtyard, where all the smokers congregated.

Spencer looked over at Ashley pointing at Glen, Ashley nodded understanding the silent code immediately.

It was a short walk to the outside, and Spencer was surprised to find it deserted she rolled her eyes as glen lit the cigarette and pulled the smoke into his lungs.

"I can't believe you smoke" she smiled as a small smile tugged at her brothers lips.

"I don't know why I am having a go, you never listened to me in life, I don't know why I thought now would be so different"

her eyes were drawn to the ally below them, and in the corner she could see two eyes looking at her, it was too dark to focus on any features.

"Spencer" her name was whispered so lightly, she thought for a moment it had come from the alleyway, until she realised who it was.

She turned her head slowly and noticed with an ache that Glen wasn't even looking at her, she looked to where he was facing and in the moonlight she could see her own reflection and his glinting off the glass of the building opposite.

He didn't move his eyes fixated on the reflection, "OW" he dropped the cigarette which had burned down "Bloody stupid" he looked up again and a pained smile came over his lips, he could no longer see anything.

"Stupid" he turned away and went back into the club.

She put her hand to her face as he left, and wiped a few tears away, "Shit" she looked down at the alleyway again, if there had been someone there, he was now long gone.

She looked at her reflection, then at the sky. It was a full moon.

The pain came suddenly, it passed over her like a wave, she put her hand to her heart, then it was gone. She walked forward confused. It had been so long since she had felt pain, but it didn't take her long to grasp the sensation.

Then a second wave more painful than the first overwhelmed her, she fell to her knees, her eyes blinked tears forming quickly.

The third wave was too much she fell hard to the ground, she knew if she had been alive she would have been badly bruise. She dug her hands in to the slab beneath her. She was trying to hold on, something was pulling her away from this place.

The pain was intense clouding her mind, but one person stood out amongst the anguish "Ashley" She wouldn't leave her, not again, not so soon. She fought against the pain. "I" she pushed herself up "WILL" and dragged her body to stand "STAY" and walked, the pain left.

She got to the door of the club her mind clearer not fogged up with pain she felt nauseous, but continued to walk, once inside she felt relief flood her.

"Not tonight" she said to no one, she rushed back in, throngs of people dancing drinking laughing.

She only looked for one person, she caught her eye quickly, Ashley had obviously been looking for her when she hadn't returned from seeing Glen.

Ashley went to stand, she recognised the look of fear on Spencer's face, but the blond got to her too soon to cause any tongue to speculate.

"We need to go" Ashley nodded, though said nothing, stood quickly.

"Where you going?" Kyla looked up smiling.

"I..." Ashley didn't know what to say she had almost told her the truth, but Kyla read her sisters face, knew there was something wrong.

"Aiden, are you ok to drive us, I'm getting tired" He nodded sensing this was not the time to moan about wanting to stay out. He looked at Ashley she had paled considerably.

"Of course, See you Glen, have a safe journey back dude" Glen nodded shaking his hand and hugging the girls.

In the dark of the club nobody noticed how tightly Ashley's hand was being squeezed by someone that none of them could see.

And Spencer so caught up in the moment didn't notice a man behind her who was only had eyes for her.


End file.
